You Get What You Need

Yesterday was not a great day. Everyone was tired and grumpy/sassy/mean/argumentative. Bryan had to work late so I was faced with four very loud children who all needed me to pay attention to them at the same time. On top of that, there was a meanness that just wouldn't go away. I begged that we stop the bossing and the critical words, but I was met with deaf ears. It got so bad I didn't something I'd never done before: I told the kids I was done for the night.

At 5:50 I took Topher upstairs, locked my door, and got him into his pajamas. I sat and tried to do his bedtime routine. I was determined not to go back downstairs until either Bryan was home or the kids had found their way to bed. While Topher ate, I thought about what I would read or listen to or watch to keep my very tired self awake. That's when I remembered that I needed to go over my Sunday School lesson for this coming Sunday. I opened the material on my phone and started to read.

One of the talks I was supposed to study wouldn't download from the link in the lesson manual. I tried four or five times and the connection kept failing. I finally decided to go find it a different way. I opened what I thought was the correct set of General Conference talks and started looking for the speaker.

That's when my eyes fell on a talk title that sounded familiar. It wasn't the one I'd been looking for, but I got the distinct impression that it was the one I needed. I listened to the first few minutes of Jeffrey R. Holland's The Tongue of Angels from the April 2007 General Conference, then paused it and decided that I needed to share it with the kids. At that moment Peter knocked on my door. I answered it and he asked if he could give me a hug. I said yes. He told me that while I'd been upstairs the kids had cleaned the previously messy first floor. Topher and I followed him down the stairs and I thanked everyone for cleaning. Cooper had even served the leftovers I'd been preparing when I'd retreated to my room.

Then we all watched the talk together. I paused it halfway through and we talked about what we'd heard, then we finished it. We discussed more about how the teachings applied to us and what we could do to be better. We said family prayers and headed off to do the bedtime routine.

I don't want to have another day like yesterday (though I'm certain we will), but I am thankful that it ended well. And I'm thankful that I was still able to hear the Spirit whisper that we needed to listen to that particular talk. I'm going to count it as a tender mercy.

The Ninja

Cooper could not decide on a Halloween costume this year. When I asked what he wanted to be he said things like, "A blade of grass" and just two days before he needed a costume, "A fidget spinner!" He also wanted to be an inflatable car. I couldn't make any of those happen. I knew time was counting down to when he would need a costume, so on Monday Sophie, Topher, and I hit the picked over shelves of Walmart. After much searching, we came home with three possible costumes: the Flash, a vampire, and a ninja. I told him to pick one and I would take the others back.

He picked the ninja.

We went to Cooper's costume parade yesterday at his school. After waiting in the cold wind for twenty minutes, Cooper's class walked by our spot. I called out to him to come closer so I could take his picture, but apparently he took his role as a ninja very seriously. Can you find him in these?

He's a black and blue ninja. And part of him is visible in every picture. The last two are the best I was able to get.

 

He's a sneaky ninja.

"Quick, I'll Distract Him With a Book So I Can Snuggle Him!"

Dissection of the Specimen

I taught our preschool co-op last week. We studied the letter p, the number 6, and pumpkins. This included cutting into a pumpkin and pulling out the gooey goodness inside. Everybody stuck their hand in at least once, but two of them were more willing than the others to get messy. Sophie, as a happy participant, still washed her hands several times. I'm not sure why I decided this was an activity we needed to do since I don't like carving pumpkins with my own kids. Maybe because there was only one pumpkin to deal with? Maybe because we weren't carving it into a jack-o-lantern? Maybe because it was in the name of science? Whatever possessed me, it went well and was a successful diversion.

On Fasting

At General Conference a few weeks ago, President Nelson challenged all the women (since the talk was delivered during the women's session) to fast from social media for ten days. I started that night and deleted Facebook from my phone. I don't have other social media accounts (with the exception of Pinterest, which I don't use as social media), so Facebook was the only one I had to worry about. My fast ended up lasting eleven days instead of ten and I finally logged back on late Wednesday night.

I fast from social media about once a month on a regular basis, but only for a day at a time. I know that there's a feeling of peace that comes with it. And I felt that this time as well. I'm more focused, more present, a better listener, and more patient when I'm not thinking about what I read on Facebook. That held true for this extended fast.

Another thing that I realized: I'm pretty isolated as a stay-at-home-mom. Add to that the facts that I'm an extrovert and that my husband was out of town for half the fast. I was lonely. I didn't have time (when my hands were free) to write emails or the quiet needed to call people, so I was even more aware of it.

I was pleased to discover that I use my time pretty well on a regular basis. I thought I'd discover more time since I wasn't staring at Facebook, but I didn't. It turns out I only look at Facebook when I'm feeding Topher or holding him while he's asleep or while doing other waiting types of activities. I had setup social media rules for myself long ago that I still follow. The rules include staying off my phone or computer while my kids are awake and making sure my scripture study is done before scrolling through updates.

At the end of the fast I wasn't sure that I wanted to log back on to Facebook. In reality, I needed to check it because all three of our schools use it to communicate with parents, but I was concerned that I'd get sucked in. Because of the fast I think it's easier to check what I need to check and put the phone down again without feeling the need to read every update.

I'll continue to fast Facebook on the first Sunday of each month. It's a good mental reset.

Candid

Cooper swiped my camera yesterday for about five minutes. I discovered lots of blurry images of my less-than-tidy house, a few crisp clear ones showing the same disorder, and some cool outdoor shots. My favorite, though, is this one. I'm sure you can tell why.

Delighted

As I walked Sophie to a friend's house today, we looked for pictures in the clouds. Sophie saw a dragon and I saw an island.

Sophie: Is it by my dragon?

Me: (looking at the clouds, trying to decide which one could be the dragon) You know, it might be your dragon.

Sophie: I'm going to name her Maunschun Sophie. (pause) What does Maunschun mean?

Me: I think you just made it up, so I don't think it means anything.

Sophie: It means beautiful and delighted and funny. And fun. I'm definitely all of those things. I'm always delighted.

Smile for the Camera

Sophie, Topher, and I went with some friends to a local pumpkin patch yesterday. The kids played in what can best be described as a sandbox, but instead of sand there were dried kernels of corn. We also wandered a kid-sized corn maze. The highlight, other than visiting with friends, was that one of the other moms had her fancy camera to practice her photography skills. She took these and shared them with the rest of us. I watched Sophie pose for the camera, so I am extra impressed that my friend was able to get so many natural looking pictures of our girl.

Me and Them

Bryan was in Utah from early Thursday morning until late last night. That was my first time on my own with five kids.

I'm glad he's home.

And I really need a nap.

The Perfect Name

A few weeks ago a large spider decided to make her home right outside our sliding glass door. As we watched her weave her web, Sophie was fascinated by our eight-legged visitor.

Sophie: Can I name it?
Me: Sure.
Sophie: I will call her...Night. No...Black. No...Widow. No...Black Widow. No. Michelle.

And throughout the day she would ask how "Shelley" was doing on her web.