Don't Fence Me In

When people at church comment on how busy Topher is, I usually respond with some variation of, "Oh, Peter was way more active, I'm used to this." Often that's true. And sometimes it's not. Tuesday afternoon brought a new adventure that we hadn't experienced with any of the other kids.

A sweet family with two boys Topher's age moved into the house next door last June. Between waiting to be fully vaccinated, finally being able to spend time running errands, and the cold winter that wouldn't go away, we haven't been outside much to wave at them in their yard. But over the last two weeks we've been out a lot more. Their boys have played in our backyard several times and Topher has played in their yard as well.

On Tuesday, after traveling in and out of our yard through their gate several times, the neighbor boys had gone back to play in their own yard for a bit. Their mom was working on an outdoor project that required her attention, so I told Topher he needed to stay in our yard. He was not pleased with this answer. I had my own project, but I looked up regularly to monitor Topher.

At one point I saw that he had taken off his hat and hung it just inside their fence. I thought he was going to throw the hat into their yard so he would have a reason to go over. I focused again on my work for a minute, then looked up again. This time, instead of just his hat on the other side of the fence, it was his whole body, except for his head. I watched as realization dawned on his face that his head simply would not fit through those bars.

Peter and I ran to Topher, so did the mom next door. Topher was starting to panic. So was I, but I was able to keep it on the inside. I tried to slide him back through, but he was solidly stuck. Peter crouched down and studied the issue from a different angle. He saw that Topher had twisted his torso and that made it impossible to slide back through. Peter gently shifted him back, then tugged and encouraged and coached Topher to suck in his belly as much as possible. Finally, Peter was able to get him back through.

I hugged Topher as soon as he was free and thanked Peter several times. Then I pulled up Topher's shirt to examine the damage. He had the beginnings of bruises on his chest and several marks on his stomach and back. He was very shaken by the experience and looked scared. I felt the same way.

I apologized to the neighbor, and offered to replace the fence panel when he discovered he had actually bent the bars apart when he maneuvered through. She said it was no big deal, that they could pound it back into place with a mallet, and that she just hoped Topher was okay. Then I took Topher inside, gave him a quick bath to wash away the sweat and dirt from playing outside, then sat him on the couch with an ice pack for those bruises.

I think it was a pretty traumatic experience for him. I asked him about it yesterday and he got really quiet and still when he talked about what had happened. He has told me that he won't do it again. I hope he remembers that resolve.