Maths

"Topher, algebra has lots of variables." - Phoebe, excited to explain the only math she enjoys, after discovering that Topher's math homework had early algebraic elements.

Lesson Learned

After waking up sick on Friday I made myself rest as much as possible on both Friday and Saturday. Bryan made it possible by taking on my jobs as well as his. By Saturday afternoon I wasn't feeling totally well, but I was feeling guilty for staying in bed and not helping around the house. Usually I would have gotten up and done chores.

But not this time.

I continued to make myself stay in bed. I was supposed to teach Relief Society and lead choir practice the next day and I really wanted to be well enough to do that. So even though I had started to feel a little better, I intentionally kept recuperating.

You know what? I woke up on Sunday morning and I felt well!

I feel like it shouldn't have taken me 43 years to learn that rest really does help with recovery. But it did take that long. I hope the lesson sticks.

Water Babies

I discovered this summer that our local middle school (our town is so small, we only have one), offers swimming lessons during the summer. Sophie had been asking to take swimming lessons, so I signed her and Topher and Phoebe up for one week. When we arrived the first day we discovered they were essentially private lessons, the classes had no more than two students, most only had one. I had no idea when I'd registered them, I'd thought it would be several kids per teacher. 

They learned so much that first week that I signed Sophie and Topher up again for a second week while Phoebe was off camping. This is the final week of lessons for the summer and I registered all three of them, now the third week for Topher and Sophie and the second week for Phoebe. They'll have their last lesson today. I'm seriously floored by how far they've come in these few weeks of swimming.

Believe it or not, all three kids are in this picture. Topher and Phoebe are both on surfboards (to teach paddling and balance) and Sophie is in the water near Phoebe.

Hard vs. Soft

For part of our Come, Follow Me lesson last week we talked about not having hard hearts, being teachable. While I told the story of the Israelites having to wander in the wilderness for forty years because of their hard hearts, the kids used play-doh to create their own soft hearts. Some of them had really soft play-doh that was easy to mold, some of them had harder play-doh that took more effort.

Then we used a rock and a washcloth to demonstrate the difference between a soft heart and a hard heart. I got a dropper of water and told the kids that the drops of water represented the truths of the Gospel. When I dripped it onto the rock, the water slipped off. We talked about erosion, so that over a long period of time, bits of the hard rock (or hard heart) will chip off, but it's a long hard process. The washcloth, the soft heart, soaked the water right up, showing that a soft heart is much more able to take in the truths of the Gospel.

The kids enjoyed the lesson.

Topher thought the play-doh was delicious.

Artist Party

The girls went to a Rapunzel/painting birthday party last week. The main activity was an art lesson taught by the art teacher from Cooper's school. There were twenty-four kids of varying ages and abilities all trying to paint the same picture.

This was the inspiration painting.

I did my best to document the process.

After the painting, Rapunzel showed up to sing to and sprinkle glitter on the kids. So much glitter.

Here are the final products from the art lesson. The girls proudly hung them on their bedroom walls. I love that they each put their own spin on the assignment.

Teacher Training

Phoebe: Mom, can I do a reading lesson with Sophie?

Me: Sure.

Professionally Trained

This weekend Phoebe was struggling with a story she was writing for school. She wanted my help. Can you see what I wrote on my otherwise empty (it's a new month, I haven't filled it up yet) calendar which happens to hang next to the computer where she was working?

Here, I'll give you a closer look.

A quick explanation of dramatic structure wasn't exactly the kind of help she wanted, but I enjoyed it. And don't worry, I explained exposition, I just wrote down "background" for clarity.

I'm thankful that I find ways to use my college degree in my career as a mom.

Answer In Love

Like planets aligning, our family scripture study and my personal scripture study happen to be at about the same place right now. We're reading Alma 60 and today I read Alma 61. Alma 60 is the chapter where Moroni, while leading the Nephite army, sends a letter of rebuke to the chief judge Pahoran, chastising him for failing to send much needed aid to the army.

Moroni, a wonderful leader and person, throws all kinds of accusations at Pahoran, claiming that he's seeking after power and slothful and wicked. In short, Moroni is full of righteous indignation and unleashes it on Pahoran.

I've been on the receiving end of some pretty awful letters, accusing me of of terrible things that I haven't done, so perhaps that's why Pahoran's response speaks to me. Rather than returning anger for anger, he responds with love. He explains that he's been thrown out of the government, that those they are fighting now have control. He commiserates with the plight of Moroni's army and confirms that they are still on the same side. In Alma 61:9 he says

9 And now, in your epistle you have censured me, but it mattereth not; I am not angry, but do rejoice in the greatness of your heart. I, Pahoran, do not seek for power, save only to retain my judgment-seat that I may preserve the rights and the liberty of my people. My soul standeth fast in that liberty in the which God hath made us free.

There are so many admirable people in the scriptures, but I think Pahoran may be one of my favorites, simply for how he answers Moroni. I know from first-hand experience the struggle of responding to such a letter. The big difference is that I was met with wrath rather than righteous indignation. Nevertheless, Pahoran's example is one that I try to follow. Sometimes I've answered, sometimes I've simply let it go, realizing that in that situation I didn't have the power to change someone else's false perceptions of me.

You know what I think is truly wonderful about the scriptural account? In chapter 62 Moroni gets Pahoran's letter and he believes it! He marches to Pahoran's aid and, eventually, peace is restored. I love these chapters.

The Candid Mom

Sophie likes to grab my phone and take pictures while I'm busy doing other things. Last night, after church but before dinner, she took this picture of me and Phoebe. I had no idea it was being taken. This photo illustrates a major part of my role as a mom.

We were all pitching in to get ready for dinner. Kids had (mostly) hung up their church clothes, done some light tidying, and were about to gather items for today's school lunch. Cooper had a headache and therefore a pass at helping, but Peter and Phoebe each had tasks. Peter was making the scrambled eggs for our breakfast-for-dinner while I prepared the oatmeal and the bacon. Phoebe was asked to thoroughly wipe off the table.

Now, you can only see the back of Phoebe's head in this picture. That means you can't tell how she felt about her job. Several phrases came out of her mouth such as, "This is impossible!" and "I can't do this!" and "I'm not perfect you know!" This is her regular approach to chores, so I wasn't overly phased. What I did do, and this drove her totally crazy, was ask her to keep coming back into the kitchen, after she believed she was done, until the job was completed to my satisfaction.

I understand that she's seven and hasn't mastered all the jobs we ask her to perform. I don't expect perfection, but I do expect effort. I also know that if we accept unfinished or sloppy work, then we're not teaching our kids how to do the best job they can. I wasn't unkind, but I was consistent. Granted, she thought I was being terrible for calling her back repeatedly. I walked around the table over and over with her to show her the spots that were still there. This picture shows me indicating something that wasn't all the way clean. She huffed and grumped and complained loudly, but she did the job. And each time a spot disappeared thanks to her effort, I pointed it out.

I wonder what she'll remember, the suffering of having to do chores? Or the satisfaction of getting the job done and doing it well?

Moving Pictures

Peter's caught the film-making bug. I took this picture of him today, sitting at the computer, doing a Khan Academy lesson on animation. We had to insist that he join us for dinner, he really just wanted to keep learning about this subject.

Mulish

Today the kids and I visited a living historical farm. We learned all kinds of interesting things, but one item stood out to me.

The animal in this picture is named Janie. You can't tell, but she's a mule. The young man that showed us the barns and animals taught us that mules are smarter than horses. Horses will continue working, regardless of the heat or their health and well-being. But mules understand when they have done too much or when it's too hot, and they will stop working. He told us that they like to have a mule work with the horses because the mule will let the farmers know when the animals need a break.

After he finished telling us all this, I asked, "So what you're saying is, when we talk about the stubbornness of mules..." And I stopped, not sure how to finish.

"Yes," he answered, "it's because they're being smart."

Now, I know that human obstinacy does not always come from a place of intelligence, but this information is good for me to think on. We have a house full of shockingly strong-willed people. I think perhaps I need to do a better job of taking a step back from my own stubbornness and seeing the situation from the other side. Maybe, occasionally, that tenacious tendency comes from a place of self-preservation and protection. In fact, without much effort, I can think of a few times when that has been the case in our family.

So the next time someone calls you "stubborn as a mule," say thank you.

Abstract Art

"Mom, I thought it was paper."

Junior Photographers

About a month ago I learned that our piano teacher also teaches art. After mulling it over for a bit, I asked if she'd be willing to teach the boys both art and piano, alternating subjects every other week. She was willing and the boys were very excited. They came home from their first day of art and announced that their homework was to draw something everyday. They also asked if they could borrow my phone to take pictures of things that they wanted to draw. And that, my friends, is why all of these pictures suddenly appeared in my photo folder.

I believe Cooper took the first one and the rest were from Peter.

The Writing on the Wall, Er, Piano

I heard Miss Sophie playing the piano in the library yesterday. After a nice long concert, I walked in to check on her and discovered that she was pounding on the keys, a pink pen in one hand and a pencil in the other.

She and I spent time scrubbing the keys, and the screen, and the controls. The pencil came off, but my keyboard is still tattooed pink.

When she realized that the outcome of her manner of making music made me sad, she consoled me with a tight hug and "I sorry Mama, I so sorry."

Recipe for the Perfect FHE

Peter planned Family Home Evening tonight as one of the requirements for his Arrow of Light. He gave a sweet lesson on the First Vision, then we all cleared the table of our chicken, rice, salad, and apple cider (because we often have FHE during our evening meal), changed into PJs, brushed teeth, put on shoes, and headed outside. 

The activity that he planned was something that he learned about at school today. A supply rocket headed for the International Space Station was scheduled for launch out of Virginia tonight at 7:40 EST, which meant that we would be able to see a very tiny red light shooting into space a few minutes after that.

We gathered on the sidewalk in front of our house, anxiously checking our clocks, and actively keeping Sophie from running into the street. Several people drove by and no doubt wondered what we were doing. Bryan found the live launch feed and we listened to Mission Control and the countdown, which had been delayed by a few minutes. We were all excited and I think almost all of us saw the rocket. 

On our way in Cooper discovered a toad hopping between the bushes near our garage. We all huddled around it, flashlights on. As we walked inside, Phoebe announced, "Mom, we had a really good day today. First we had apple cider, then we watched a rocket launch, then A TOAD!"

Can you find our friendly neighborhood toad?

In case you need ideas for your next Monday night, apparently apple cider + rocket launch + toad = a winning FHE combination.

When the Lessons Begin to Show

"Cooper, you just have to be good all the time. You have to be good because it's good, not because you'll get a reward."

This is what Peter told Cooper after dinner one night this week when Cooper was having a particularly rough time. Peter said it in a kind, caring, older brother sort of way.

My children continually surprise me.

Sisterhood

I had the opportunity to teach Relief Society yesterday. As a member of the presidency, I get to teach roughly once every three months, and I choose the topic. Our focus for the year is on service, so I figured that would make for good lesson material. I worked under that assumption until yesterday. The quotes and talks I found were good, but I felt that something was missing. So I prayed and waited for inspiration.

That's why I spent the Sunday School hour of church standing in the church library, sketching out my lesson plan. I had several quotes to choose from and a rough idea, but that was it. Even after I had it planned, I made changes in the minutes before I stood to teach and then again as I was teaching. I believe that good teachers prepare much more than they need to, plan, then improvise changes as needed. Rather than teaching about service, I taught about sisterhood through service.

My main quote that I kept referring to was from Lucy Mack Smith, the mother of Joseph Smith. She said, “We must cherish one another, watch over one another, comfort one another and gain instruction, that we may all sit down in heaven together.”

Want to read the other quotes I used?

1. The Savior taught that the first and great commandment is: “Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind… And the second is like unto it, Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself. On these two commandments hang all the law and the prophets” The Savior’s words are simple, yet their meaning is profound and deeply significant. We are to love God and to love and care for our neighbors as ourselves. Imagine what good we can do in the world if we all join together, united as followers of Christ, anxiously and busily responding to the needs of others and serving those around us—our families, our friends, our neighbors, our fellow citizens. -Elder M. Russell Ballard, OCTOBER 2012 Be Anxiously Engaged 

1. That simple practice is: In your morning prayer each new day, ask Heavenly Father to guide you to recognize an opportunity to serve one of His precious children. Then go throughout the day with your heart full of faith and love, looking for someone to help... If you do this, your spiritual sensitivities will be enlarged and you will discover opportunities to serve that you never before realized were possible.-Elder M. Russell Ballard, OCTOBER 2012 Be Anxiously Engaged  

1. Mosiah18: 8-11 

1. For some, serving or ministering one by one, following the Savior’s example, doesn’t come easily. But with practice, each of us can become more like the Savior as we serve God’s children. To help us better love one another, I would like to suggest four words to remember: “First observe, then serve.”-Sister Linda K. Burton, OCTOBER 2012 First Observe, Then Serve

1. One night our little son Richard, who had a heart problem, awoke crying. … Normally my wife always got up to take care of a crying baby, but this time I said, ‘I’ll take care of him. Because of his problem, when he began to cry, his little heart would pound very rapidly. He would throw up and soil the bed clothing. That night I held him very close to try to calm his racing heart and stop his crying as I changed his clothes and put on new bedsheets. I held him until he went to sleep. I didn’t know then that just a few months later he would pass away. I will always remember holding him in my arms in the middle of that night. - Elder Richard G. Scott, APRIL 2011 The Eternal Blessings of Marriage 

1. In the strength of the Lord, we “can do all things.” We continually seek His guidance in prayer, in the scriptures, and in the whisperings of the Holy Ghost. One sister, faced with an overwhelming assignment, wrote, “Sometimes I wonder if the sisters in the early history of the Church didn’t, like us, put their heads on their pillows at night and pray, ‘Whatever tomorrow brings, will Thou help me through it?’” Then she wrote, “One of the blessings is [that] we have each other and we are in this together!” Whatever our circumstances, wherever we are along the path toward salvation, we unite as one in our commitment to the Savior. We sustain one another in His service. -– Sister Carol F. McConkie, OCTOBER 2015 Here to Serve a Righteous Cause 

1. None of us is perfect. We have all made mistakes. But we repent so that we may be better and “retain the name [of Christ] written always in [our] hearts.” When we serve in the name of the Lord, with purity of heart, we reflect the Savior’s love and give others a glimpse of heaven. -– Sister Carol F. McConkie, OCTOBER 2015 Here to Serve a Righteous Cause 

1. I love the women of the Church, young and old. I have seen your strength. I have seen your faith. You have something to give and are willing to give it. You do this without fanfare or publicity, drawing attention to the God we worship, not yourselves, and with no thought of what you will receive. That’s what disciples do! - Sister Linda K. Burton,  APRIL 2014 Wanted: Hands and Hearts to Hasten the Work

1. Though in many ways we are different and unique, we also acknowledge that we are all daughters of the same Heavenly Father, which makes us sisters. We are unified in building the kingdom of God and in the covenants which we have made, no matter what our circumstances. This combined assembly is, without a doubt, the most glorious sisterhood upon the face of the earth! To be sisters implies that there is an unbreakable bond between us. Sisters take care of each other, watch out for each other, comfort each other, and are there for each other through thick and thin. The Lord has said, “I say unto you, be one; and if ye are not one ye are not mine.” -Sister Bonnie L. Oscarson, APRIL 2014 Sisterhood: Oh, How We Need Each Other 

1. (W)e have each other—sisters in the gospel of Jesus Christ. We have been blessed with tender and charitable natures which enable us to render Christlike love and service to those around us. As we look beyond our differences in age, culture, and circumstance to nurture and serve one another, we will be filled with the pure love of Christ and the inspiration which leads us to know when and whom to serve. -Sister Bonnie L. Oscarson, APRIL 2014 Sisterhood: Oh, How We Need Each Other 

1.  Oh, how we need each other. Those of us who are old need you who are young. And, hopefully, you who are young need some of us who are old. It is a sociological fact that women need women. We need deep and satisfying and loyal friendships with each other. - Sister Marjorie P. Hinckley, Glimpses into the Life and Heart of Marjorie Pay Hinckley, ed. Virginia H. Pearce (1999), 254–55.  

See the Good

After a day of car maintenance (done by a repairman, not me) and grocery shopping (price matching for the win!), the girls and I were driving home to refrigerate our yogurt and milk before quickly leaving to get the boys from school. I was watching the clock, estimating how much time I would have to unload the groceries before we started our walk.

The red light I had been waiting on changed to green and I realized all the cars in front of me were changing lanes. All the cars, except one. I followed suit, just in time for the light to change to red again. I glanced over to my right at the older model red car, hazards blinking, a petite grandma in the driver's seat.

I looked at the clock. Did I have time to stop? And if I did stop, what service could I provide? I was debating my next move when I saw two road construction workers in the turn lane to my left. They were unloading equipment, preparing to start their work.

"Please see that woman," I thought. "Come on, look over there."

While one pulled something heavy from their truck, the other glanced over his shoulder in the direction of the woman. I saw a quick moment of decision pass over his face, then he gestured to his coworker to put the machine down and follow him. I watched as the two men walked over to the woman, asked how they could help, and prepared to push her car out of traffic and into the parking lot of a gas station on the opposite corner. The light changed and I drove off as they helped her out of her car.

I'm sure those two men have no idea I was watching their actions. Nor will they ever know how deeply impressed I was. I saw a need, but didn't have the resources to help. They did and they put those resources to good use.

There are good people in the world.

The Highs Are Greater Than the Lows

After we finished a few morning chores (does anyone else have to include putting on daytime clothes in the chores category?), we took the day off from unpacking. Our first stop was a fun, albeit cold, splash pad. The big kids loved it, Sophie wanted nothing to do with it. At one point Peter tried to show her how much fun she could have and led her through a misting double arch. She looked completely betrayed and refused to go near the water after that.

After the water play, we went home for lunch and spent the afternoon playing in the backyard. Well, the kids played while I made a tiny dent in the field of weeds we have back there, but I like weeding, so we can count that as playing. The kids rode bikes and scooters and gathered rocks out of the neglected landscaping.

Then we took a walk to the boys' school and played at the playground. Highlights included seeing a rabbit, meeting one of our neighbors on the walk back, and subsequently being invited to a neighborhood party.

You want to know something funny? Looking at my account of the day, it seems pretty idyllic, doesn't it? But I didn't see it that way as the day was happening. The kids have all had trouble sleeping (new house worries?) and are reaching a new level of cranky and tired. They each show it in different ways. Peter argues more and gets increasingly defiant (which is kind of mind boggling), Cooper screams and hits and whines to the point that you can't really understand what he's saying. Phoebe takes dramatic to new heights and yells ALL THE TIME. Sophie gets silly, which I can deal with.

And I'm tired and feeling stressed that the boys aren't enrolled in school even though it starts next week and that I still haven't finished unpacking and that the kitchen is so small I'm having trouble finding counter space to prepare any food and between work and his commute Bryan has been out of the house for twelve hours each day for the last three days and I'm feeling overworked and underpaid.

However.

At dinner tonight all the kids told Bryan how awesome the day was. Phoebe, ever the employer of hyperbole, said it was, "the best day ever." Dinner was a calm and happy affair, the kids were all bathed without much contention and scripture reading and family prayer both happened without constant calls for reverence.

And now I can look back and see all the good things that happened. The splash pad was fun, even Sophie enjoyed walking the perimeter with me even if she wouldn't touch the water. I joined the kids in the backyard when I was feeling particularly stressed. The vitamin D had a positive effect, as did ripping those weeds out. In order to go on the walk I told the kids they needed to put away all the backyard toys, which meant they actually helped out with the cleaning. And they were worn out from all the outside play, so they fell asleep much faster.

I guess that's the beauty of perspective. I can see past the rough parts of the day and cherish the good.

Handiwork

During our snow day on Monday I was determined to finish a project I had been working on. I usually do that sort of stuff at night after the kids have gone to sleep, but since Sophie hasn't been sleeping well and Peter's bedtime has gotten later recently, I don't have much project time these days. So when Sophie went down for a nap, I started sewing.

In keeping with my goal to make our house a little fancier, I decided to make some throw pillow covers. Bryan realized that if we bought cheap bed pillows at Walmart we could shake the stuffing down and reshape them to look like throw pillows. And that's just what we did. Last week I found some fabric that I like and on Monday I sewed them. That sounds like it was easy, and I'm happy to say it wasn't as hard as past sewing endeavors have been.

The kids were fascinated by the sewing machine. Instead of shooing them away, I asked if they wanted to have a sewing lesson. Now, me offering to give someone a sewing lesson is very much a blind-leading-the-blind situation. Nevertheless, the kids were all excited.

Peter went first. After showing him how to sew a straight line, he ran to my fabric box, picked out a piece of felt, and announced that he wanted to make a bag for Phoebe. And so he did. I sewed the button on, cut the button hole, and helped him feed the material under the needle, but he did most of the rest of it. Phoebe was delighted with her bag.

Cooper and Phoebe also practiced sewing straight lines, but we ran out of time for them to do anything else. No one sewed their fingers, no one broke my sewing machine, everyone wants to try sewing again. I consider that a success.

Next they all want to learn how to crochet.