Trimmed Out

I've spent my week getting ready for Thanksgiving. I've baked and cleaned and sorted.

And stayed up until 3AM on Monday painting the banister and entryway trim.

You know, the basics.

Every Little Bit Helps

Cooper had another track meet yesterday. I wasn't sure if we would make it in time to see him run. The high school and the middle school share a track and this was a home meet. It worked out that I was picking Phoebe up from her rehearsal just a few minutes before his race. He crossed the street in front of our van and told us he had just been called. We found a parking place and Phoebe, Topher, and I made a beeline for the bleachers.

This was the coldest meet they've had. Winter can't quite let go and the high yesterday was 42 degrees. It was difficult sitting and watching the races, I can't imagine how it felt to run in that cold.

He ran the 1600M again and his goal was to shave five seconds off of his last run time. He started out in the back of the pack,  but by the end he had pulled ahead of four of the other runners. His previous time was 5:57. Yesterday his time was 5:40! He was kind of in shock that he'd trimmed seventeen seconds off! He didn't place, but that wasn't the goal. He was really pleased with his progress.

In the picture, Cooper is the one in the short sleeved white under shirt. The first picture is at the end of the first lap, the second picture is at the end of the fourth lap. And the fellow standing by the track in the second picture is from our ward. He happened to be there to watch his son run for the other team. I called out a hello and we chatted a bit. Every time Cooper ran by, our friend cheered for him.

One for the Books

While this picture of the bookcases might not look that different from the one at the end of this post, it is. The shelves now have two coats of matte water-based polyurethane, which was not super fun to apply. But now it's done. And the books are mostly sorted. I haven't put the crown molding on yet, but that's because I know the look I want and I haven't found the right pieces yet, so I'm waiting. And the carpet needs to be tucked under, but hopefully that'll be done soon.

This picture makes me really happy.

Portraits

Phoebe is doing a project based on The Greatest Showman for school. She's spent several days drawing some of the characters. I snapped the pictures before she was finished, so these are still works-in-progress. I think Zendaya's character is my favorite of this set of her drawings.

Progress

Framed

I had a major lull in my moving-in energy. It left right about the time we got out our Christmas decorations. Thankfully, since we put Christmas away right before the new year, my drive to continue the unpacking process has slowly been returning. Technically, nearly everything is unpacked, it's just that some of it is sitting in piles and baskets waiting to find a home.

Several of these piles are composed of pictures I've intended to put on the walls. I'm not sure why putting nails in our own walls is more intimidating than hanging pictures in rentals was, but I've been frozen with indecision. I've spent too much time staring at blanks walls, visualizing. Finally, on Sunday morning I asked Phoebe to trace these many frames on pieces of paper (or to tape paper together, depending on the size needed) so I would have templates to tape to the walls. That way I could see what they would look like without knocking unnecessary holes in the walls.

That method worked well. I'm happy to report that we've made good progress on the piles of pictures. There are still some that need to go up, but way fewer than before.

The Biblio Files: 2021

2021 was an interesting year for reading. I read a total of 125 books, an increase of 25 from last year. Two of the months I only read 5 books each, though one of those was a 57 hour audiobook. During August I knocked out 20 books, 3 of those I listened to during our last night in our old townhouse when I stayed up packing until the sun came up. Of the 125, I read 8 from my Kindle, I listened to the other 117. Technically I read two more to Sophie during bedtime, but she read a few chapters on her own, so I'm going to go back and read what I missed and add it to my 2022 list, which I've already started working on.

The best books I read this year are underlined (I've recommended many of these to friends and family), book club picks are italicized. One of my book clubs fizzled out at about the same time a new Facebook book club was starting. And my favorite two-person book club is still going strong.

Do you have any book recommendations for me? I'm always looking for new titles to add to my holds list at the library.

January:

1. Across That Bridge by John Lewis
2. The Invisible Library by Genevieve Cogman*
3. The Day the World Came to Town by Jim Defede
4. Channel of Peace by Kevin Tuerff
5. Persuasion by Jane Austen
6. The Masked City by Genevieve Cogman*
7. The 7 1/2 Deaths of Evelyn Hardcastle by Stuart Turton
8. The Unexpected Deliverer by David Butler and Emily Belle Freeman

February:

1. A Walk in My Shoes by Ben Schilaty
2. The Burning Page by Genevieve Cogman*
3. The Lost Plot by Genevieve Cogman*
4. The Priesthood Power of Women by Barbara Morgan Gardner
5. Women and the Priesthood by Sheri Dew
6. The Name of This Book is Secret by Pseudonymous Bosch
7. Present Over Perfect by Shauna Niequist
8. The Bad Beginning by Lemony Snicket
9. Sarah by Orson Scott Card
10. Rebekah by Orson Scott Card
11. Rachel and Leah by Orson Scott Card

March:

1. The Gifts of Imperfection by Brene Brown
2. Braving the Wilderness by Brene Brown
3. A Girl Named Zippy by Haven Kimmel
4. She Got Up Off the Couch by Haven Kimmel
5. The Moment of Lift by Melinda Gates
6. The False Prince by Jennifer A. Nielsen
7. A Lantern in Her Hand by Bess Streeter Aldrich
8. The Goose Girl by Shannon Hale
9. Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant
10. Reaching for the Savior by Reyna I. Aburto
11. ADHD and Me by Blake E. S. Taylor

April:

1. October 2020 General Conference
2. The Runaway King by Jennifer A. Nielsen
3. You'll Never Believe What Happened to Lacey by Amber Ruffin and Lacey Lamar
4. The Mortal World by Genevieve Cogman*
5. Year of Yes by Shonda Rhimes
6. Your Defiant Child by Christine M. Benton and Russell Barkley
7. The Curse of the Pharaohs by Elizabeth Peters
8. Be Not Troubled by Ronald A. Rasband
9. The Story Girl by L. M. Montgomery

May:

1. The Mummy Case by Elizabeth Peters
2. I'm Still Here: Black Dignity in a World Made for Whiteness by Austin Channing Brown
3. The Shadow Throne by Jennifer A. Nielsen
4. Shadow and Bone by Leigh Bardugo*
5. 1776 by David McCullough
6. The Bomber Mafia by Malcolm Gladwell
7. Royal Target by Traci Hunter Abramson
8. Rebecca by Daphne Du Maurier
9. The War That Saved My Life by Kimberley Brubaker Bradley
10. Where the Mountain Meets the Moon by Grace Lin

June:

1. Rhythm of War by Brandon Sanderson (This one is 57 hours long, it took half the month to get through it, but it was excellent.)
2. What Happened to You? by Bruce D. Perry and Oprah Winfrey
3. The War I Finally Won by Kimberley Brubaker Bradley
4. The Girl Who Drank the Moon by Kelly Barnhill (This was a reread, it's still wonderful!)
5. Bonhoeffer by Eric Metaxas

July:

1. A Little History of the World by E. H. Gombrich
2. The Secret Chapter by Genevieve Cogman*
3. Take Back the House by Karen Latimer
4. Number the Stars by Lois Lowry
5. The Giver by Lois Lowry
6. Hotel on the Corner of Bitter and Sweet by Jamie Ford
7. The Indigo Girl by Natasha Boyd
8. North and South by Elizabeth Gaskell
9. The Sweetness at the Bottom of the Pie by Alan Bradley
10. The Weed That Strings the Hangman's Bag by Alan Bradley
11. The Nature of Fragile Things by Susan Meissner
12. In the Heights: Finding Home by Lin-Manuel Miranda, Quiara Alergria Hudes, and Jeremy McCarter
13. Embark! by John Bytheway
14. A Red Herring Without Mustard by Alan Bradley

August:

1. As You Wish by Cary Elwes and Joe Layden
2. The Iron Trial by Holly Black and Cassandra Clare
3. I Am Half-Sick of Shadows by Alan Bradley
4. Speaking From Among the Bones by Alan Bradley
5. The Copper Gauntlet by Holly Black and Cassandra Clare
6. The Dead in Their Vaulted Arches by Alan Bradley
7. The Sum of Us by Heather McGhee
8. The Bronze Key by Holly Black and Cassandra Clare
9. As Chimney Sweepers Come to Dust by Alan Bradley
10. Thrice the Brinded Cat Hath Mew'd by Alan Bradley
11. The Grave's a Fine and Private Place by Alan Bradley
12. The Silver Mask by Holly Black and Cassandra Clare
13. Ender's Game by Orson Scott Card
14. Ordinary Grace by William Kent Krueger
15. Premeditated Myrtle by Elizabeth C. Bunce
16. A Single Shard by Linda Sue Park
17. The Golden Tresses of the Dead by Alan Bradley
18. Your Patriarchal Blessing Booklet by Brad Wilcox
19. Focused by Noelle Pikus Pace
20. Give Them Pie by Ed J. Pinegar

September:

1. Little Leaders: Bold Women in Black History by Vashti Harrison
2. The Rithmatist by Brandon Sanderson
3. The Penderwicks by Jeanne Birdsall
4. Atomic Habits by James Clear
5. Goodbye, Things: The New Japanese Minimalism by Fumio Sasaki
6. My Grandmother Asked Me to Tell You She's Sorry by Fredrik Backman
7. The Penderwicks on Gardam Street by Jeanne Birdsall
8. The Penderwicks at Point Mouette by Jeanne Birdsall
9. The Book of Lost Names by Kristin Harmel
10. Among the Hidden by Margaret Peterson Haddix
11. Howl's Moving Castle by Diana Wynne Jones
12. The Penderwicks in Spring by Jeanne Birdsall
13. The Penderwicks at Last by Jeanne Birdsall
14. April 2021 General Conference

October:

1. The Crooked Sixpence by Jennifer Bell
2. The Shadow Cipher by Laura Ruby
3. All's Quiet on the Western Front by Erich Maria Remarque
4. Raising Good Humans by Hunter Clarke Fields
5. Putting It Together by James Lapine
6. Restoration: God's Call to the 21st-Century by Patrick Q. Mason
7. The Matriarch by Susan Page
8. The Woman Who Smashed the Codes by Jason Fagone

November:

1. Legion by Brandon Sanderson
2. Don't Miss This in the Doctrine and Covenants by David Butler and Emily Belle Freeman
3. The Dark Archive by Genevieve Cogman*
4. Siege and Storm by Leigh Bardugo
5. Celebrating a Christ-Centered Christmas by Emily Belle Freeman

December:

1. The Magician by Michael Scott
2. When You Reach Me by Rebecca Stead
3. The Doctrine and Covenants
4. The Sorceress by Michael Scott
5. The Necromancer by Michael Scott
6. When It Doesn't Make Sense by John Bytheway
7. The Warlock by Michael Scott
8. The Enchantress by Michael Scott
9. The Book of Mormon
10. Hunt, Gather, Parent by Michaeleen Doucleff

A Step Up

Two people at our house graduated from an air mattress to real mattresses in their room!

Progress

 

BRIGHT

Remember way back in November when I posted about Phoebe being recognized as the BRIGHT student for her class? Well, Sophie's teacher saw her hard work through the school year and named Sophie the BRIGHT student for her class for February!

Here's a reminder of what BRIGHT stands for:

She was so excited to receive the honor. I got kind of teary eyed when I found out. Sophie has worked hard this year and learned so much, I was really pleased that her teacher recognized her progress.

Well done, Sophie!

Advanced

Yesterday, in our living room, Bryan ordained Peter a priest in the Aaronic priesthood. Our Bishop and some family members were able to join over Zoom. This was such a blessing and, as my Grandma put it, a lot easier than having them travel to witness this special event. Next Sunday when we have the sacrament at home, Peter will be able to bless it. That is very exciting.

Embrace the Change

As a family we made the prayerful decision to pull the kids from our local school district and sign them up with an established cyber school. We finished the applications a few days before they announced a cap on new enrollments. Last week we docu-signed the official paperwork. On Friday morning we got an email with the kids new user names and passwords and instructions on how to access the school website.

Since then I've spent several hours each day (and I didn't realize I had any extra to spare) learning how the new school will work, reading questions and answers from other parents on the Facebook pages, ordering supplies off the lists that we now have access to, urging the kids to plow through as much of the summer reading homework as possible, and continuing to prepare our house to become school on Monday.

I feel like I should be stressed and overwhelmed and nervous about how this is all going to go down. I mean, all the other parents seem pretty nervous. And, honestly, I am stressed and overwhelmed, but not about this. I'm approaching this school year with much less stress and anxiety than usual. When I realized that I started pondering why. Why am I not riddled with nerves? Why am I not freaking out with questions about how I'm going to effectively supervise the real schoolwork (the end of last year was rough on families and teachers alike and did not conclude with much real schoolwork) of four kids at four levels while still running the house and engaging Topher?

And here's the answer I've come to: because it's the right choice. This is the right thing for our family right now. Peter is adamant that this will only last a year. Phoebe is ready to embrace it long-term. I have no idea what will happen educationally for our children when this school year is done. But I do recognize that peaceful assurance that comes from seeking divine guidance, then following it.

A Place for Everything

For the nearly five years I've had it, my desk has been the unofficial Place to Put Stuff That Doesn't Have a Home spot. I've gotten it nearly clean multiple times, but random items keep finding their way down to the basement and onto my desk. In February I decided I wanted a usable desk and I got busy sorting.

Then the world turned upside. Whatever free time I was using on my desk totally disappeared.

A few weeks ago I decided I needed to finish my desk. I took small chunks of time, sometimes only ten minute increments, to work on it every few days. Last night I saw how close I was to being done and I decided to push through.

Behold, a clean desk:

Those boxes are all organized with planned sewing projects, craft supplies, and birthday decorations. That makes it sound like this is someone else's desk, so I guess I've developed some surprising hobbies over the years.

As soon as I finished it my first thought was, "Now I can get my sewing machine out and get through some projects!"

One Day at a Time

Thank you to everyone who responded to my plea for help in knowing how to help my family deliberately practice kindness. We had a good family home evening last Tuesday night and I used some of the examples and ideas that you suggested. After discussing what our specific issues were, we decided to focus on one aspect of kindness at a time, so that our practice is more concentrated.

This week we practiced listening. We worked on listening to understand what the other person was saying, not just to respond or make our own point heard. None of us did it perfectly, but they would hear and adjust when I gave gentle reminders.

Yesterday was actually pretty calm. We made some changes to how we're doing school and that helped. But I think the biggest difference is that we've been exercising our listening skills. We didn't change our goal at Family Home Evening last night, so we have another week of listening practice ahead of us.

A Shift in Perspective

After last week I took Saturday easy. Sort of. I told Bryan that I wanted to spend time baking in preparation for Easter, so I spent several hours in the kitchen while he kept the kids alive. Baking all day doesn't sound easy, and it wasn't, but it was a treat for me since I love to bake. Then, after the kids were all in bed, I kept working in the kitchen and I listened to a wonderful book, Grace Where You Are by Emily Belle Freeman.

It had been on my list of books to read the week before Easter, but with the stress I was feeling I hadn't made it a priority. Then, during a conversation last week, my mom asked if I'd read it. That sent up a flag in my head, "Oh, this must be important, make time for it."

So I did. And it was exactly what I needed to calm my heart and my head. Our Easter was really nice, in part because I had prepared myself spiritually by reading this book.

I was surprised to see Phoebe's comment on yesterday's post. (She comments now, which I think is delightful.) She said that last week was a good week. Wow, was it? Thanks to her perspective, and some pondering of my own, I'm now able to look back and see the good parts of last week that accompanied the difficult.

Piano Man

When he started piano lessons five years ago, Cooper was not a fan. I mean, he liked the actual lessons because his teacher was nice and he got to play with Lego while Peter had his lesson, but Cooper hated practicing and did not see any reason why he should spend his time learning to play the piano.

Fast forward to today and he has very different feelings. Our piano teacher retired last summer and we switched to online piano lessons, which we LOVE! Peter and Phoebe still grumble about practicing, but Cooper willingly spends large portions of his day at the piano. I ask that they work on their lesson material for twenty minutes and then can spend the last ten minutes of their practice learning any song they want. Cooper searches YouTube for piano tutorials, then gets to work. He usually goes far beyond the expected thirty minutes.

It makes my heart happy to hear him play. And playing the piano makes his heart happy too.

Old Dog, New Tricks

Part of the reason I was willing to let Peter go tubing this week was that I went tubing for the first time just a few weeks ago. That's right, this thirty-nine year old faced some pretty serious fears and joined in for a friend's birthday celebration.

I wasn't going to go at first. It would take me away during bedtime and it sounded dangerous and I was feeling anxious about the whole thing. Bryan encouraged me to at least go and be social, even if I didn't actually slide down any mountains. I begrudgingly agreed.

I didn't tell the kids what I was doing until I was about to walk out the door. Then there were tears and pleas for me to be safe. The last thing Phoebe said to me as I walked out the door was, "I love you Mommy, please don't die."

This was our adventurous group. The birthday girl is in the orange jacket. Two of us had never done this before, but I think I was the most vocally apprehensive about it, though I did try to come off as funny instead of just terrified. Fun fact: I knew two of these women while I was at BYU as a student. BYU makes the world a smaller place.

Behold, the slope.

I look happy, right? Not like I'm about to do something that scares me to the point of a mild panic attack, yeah? That my friends, is proof that I'm a good actress.

We were all bundled. I wore a base layer, regular clothes, snow pants and a sweatshirt, a scarf, a warm jacket, ear muffs, a hat, two pairs of gloves, cozy socks, and sturdy snow boots. And it was a warm-ish evening, somewhere in the high 40s, which isn't too bad for January in Pennsylvania.

I'm the one in the picture close to the camera, but turning away. For most runs we hooked our tubes together and slid down tandem in groups of two, three, or four. This upped the velocity significantly, but I opted for that rather than a solo flight. There was one run where all but two of us went alone. The chance of spinning while speeding down the hill increased dramatically when not hooked to another tube, and that didn't appeal to me.

I did not know this picture was being taken. Once we got to the bottom of the hill we would carry our tubes to a moving walkway and ride it back up to the top. Except for when it was turned off, then we carried our tubes and huffed and puffed back up the hill.

And those are my legs and feet. When it was almost time to go down the hill I would plant myself and hold on tight to the tube, ready. I didn't want to be caught off-guard, especially since I would be pulled down by the tubes I was attached to.

After the tubing we got pizza and sang happy birthday and laughed until we couldn't breathe. The talking was the best part of the night. It is a blessing to have friends to go and have this kind of crazy adventure with. I carpooled up and back and didn't get home until after midnight.

The next morning the kids asked how it was. I told them I was glad that I went because it was wonderful spending time with friends. Then they asked about the actual tubing. I told them that it was terrifying on every single run. As we started down the hill I would have thoughts like, "I really like my teeth, I hope they stay in my head" and "I am a mother! I have children depending on me! What am I doing?! This is insanity!" It wasn't until the last run that some of those anxious feelings started to fade a little.

That said, I'm glad I went. I need people and since I have made the choice to stay at home with kids, I don't have that many chances to be around people. Talking and laughing and listening filled my soul. And it's nice to know that during the year of my fortieth birthday I can still be adventurous and do new things that scare me.

Manhattan, I Prepared for You*

Our Broadway binging was over, but we weren't quite done with New York. On Sunday morning we got up and took the subway to the Manhattan Temple, which is also the location of a regular meeting house. We knew we wanted to attend the 9 o'clock Sacrament Meeting, what we didn't know was that it was a Young Single Adult ward. The talks were great, but I definitely missed my family and my regular family ward.

With just a few hours left before we needed to head our separate ways, we took the subway south and caught a glimpse of Lady Liberty.

 Photo credit: Brett 

After some wandering and searching for the right subway station, we made it back to the hotel. We gathered our belongings and headed for our final New York bucket list item: The New York Public Library. I would expect nothing less from our little book club.

Photo credit: Brett  

It's a gorgeous building, inside and out.

Photo credit: Brett  

Since we were nearly out of time, we made a beeline for the children's department, the home of the original Pooh Bear and friends. They live in a glass case and are worn, but it's the kind of worn that comes from being loved so much. That's the type of worn that I aspire to.

Photo credit: Brett

Also, Lego lion.

And this is what the entryway to the library looks like. It is so beautiful!

Photo credit: Brett

I had waited too long and had to run. We said our goodbyes as Brett went to the hotel to retrieve her suitcase before going to JFK and her flight home to Utah and I hustled over to Port Authority. I was so proud of myself for not getting lost at all. And it was pretty important that I not detour, I got to my gate just before they started boarding. The two-hour bus ride home was pleasant and restful, though I wish I had known we couldn't eat during the trip. My snacks stayed in my bag and I focused on the book I was listening to to distract from my hunger.

Bryan brought all the kids to the airport (bus station) to pick me up. The first thing Phoebe said to me when I opened the door was, "You look younger!"

True story.

I am happy to report that I was a calmer, happier, more fun mom that first week. And all those positive benefits lasted an entire seven days. I'm only slightly less fun now, still muuuuuuuch better off mentally and emotionally than I was before the trip.

Big thanks go to two people for making this adventure possible. Thanks for trekking all over NYC and binge-watching Broadway with me Brett! It was an absolute delight! And huge thanks to Bryan for not only keeping everyone alive and fed while I was gone, but also providing a fun weekend for the kids. Need proof? Here are the pictures he sent me while I was gone:

They ate fun food, watched movies, and played video games. Several sisters at church on Sunday asked Bryan and the kids how everything was going in my absence. Sophie was quick to explain that they had had the BEST TIME EVER!

I think we all benefited from my reset.

*Final quote in the title for this trip, anybody want to guess what it's from?

Two, One, Two, One

Sophie has been doing reading lessons for a year now. That's kind of a misleading statement. We took a great big break when Topher was born, so I guess it's more accurate to say that we started reading lessons a year ago, but they certainly haven't lasted the whole duration. In that time we've restarted twice and some lessons have taken two days instead of one. We're using the same book I used to teach Peter, Cooper, and Phoebe to read. There are one hundred lesson in total. Today we finished lesson forty-two.

Today's lesson, the photo credit goes to Sophie.

Reading lessons were not easy with any of them. If memory serves, Cooper took less prodding than the others, but I think that's because we saved the lessons for just before bedtime when he and I could have one-on-one time. He thrives with that kind of attention and so didn't put up a fight. Peter and Phoebe definitely did put up fights, but they still did the lessons.

Most days Sophie flat out refuses. She's screamed, cried, thrown things out of anger at being asked to sit with me and learn to read. Occasionally she complies. Usually she does not. Last week, after I asked her to come do a reading lesson she replied, "I'm never going to do a stupid, hateful, disgusting, 100% reading lesson." Her adjective game is on point, even if her obedience leaves something to be desired.

I realize that all kids learn to read at different rates and that I probably shouldn't push it if she's not ready. But, knowing Sophie, I think it's more a case of "I don't want to and you can't make me." That's not going to work so well when she starts Kindergarten in the fall.

I was praying about how to help her, if not learn to read, at least be willing to learn in general. I listened to some really great speakers talk about motivating children and I had an idea. We tried it out the Friday before Topher went into the hospital, then a few times this week. And it's working. I mean, she still argues and doesn't want to do the reading lesson, but not as much as usual.

What are we doing differently?

Instead of pushing through and doing a lesson in one sitting, I set a timer for two minutes. When the time is up, she picks a song and has a dance party for one minute. Then we do two more minutes of reading, followed by another minute of dancing. We repeat the process until the lesson is done.

The first time it worked beautifully. She had so much fun dancing and liked that it felt more like a game. The second time she tried to run down the clock by going slowly and chatting instead of reading. I saw through her plan and told her I would pause the timer each time she stopped the lesson, thus delaying the mini dance party. She stopped that ploy. Today it worked well and went surprisingly fast.

Here's hoping we can get through a few more lessons before we have to change tactics again.

Time Lapse Proof

Peter discovered a time lapse setting on the camera on my phone. I guess that was all the inspiration he needed to record proof that he does his chores.