Creative Distractions

On Sunday I was the first adult to primary, but not the first person. The room already held several children. We have a two-deep leadership policy, which for me means, in part, not being the only adult in the room. While I waited for another grownup to come in, I leaned against the doorway and asked who wanted to draw a picture of a temple on the chalkboard. Several hands went up and I encouraged them to go for it.

This temple has a mustache instead of an Angel Moroni. I didn't realize this until one of the kids pointed it out during singing time. I thought it was a propeller.

Topher drew the temple on the right. He said he patterned it after the Washington D.C. temple.

The kids were all pleased with their art and none of them seemed to realize it was a diversionary tactic.

Dandelion Days

I was looking back through post drafts that I'd started but never finished. I found this picture with this title from back when we lived in the Chicago area, about ten years ago. I remember exactly what it was about, even though I had never added text beyond the title.

Phoebe and Sophie were still young enough that they weren't in school yet. They spent a lot of time playing pretend and running around in the backyard. On this day Phoebe had brought me this bouquet of dandelions and they'd ended up on the counter, next to the toy hair dryer.

It struck me then how fleeting this stage would be, the time of gathering dandelions and bringing them to mom with love and wonder. I'm glad that, even in the midst of the overwhelm and tired, I was aware that I should pay attention and notice the importance of these tiny moments.

And it's true, we are past the dandelion days. Topher will still occasionally bring me one of the yellow flowers, but we've mostly moved on to other stages. I love watching my kids learn and grow and become who they have the potential to be. But there's a sweet melancholy thinking about the exhaustion and happiness of the days when they were little.

World's Okayest Mom

I had a great Mother's Day. Bryan made a delicious dinner, my parents sent a few yummy treats, Topher outdid himself with how many cards he gave me, and my kids all crowded onto the couch for a picture with me. Also, after church I changed out of my dress and into comfy pants and my World's Okayest Mom shirt.

I bought it for myself.

I think it's funny.

It was lovely to have Bryan's parents here for Mother's Day. Look at this beautiful paper sculpture that Bryan's mom made for me and gave me for Mother's Day! It's the Philadelphia Temple and I adore it!

School at Home

We have used up all of our snow days, so Tuesday was our first virtual instruction day. Drawing on their three years of virtual school, my kids were well-equipped for this mode of learning. Topher was new to it, but he was so excited to have a meeting with his class on his school-issued iPad. I took very few pictures of the day, but Cooper took this one of reading time. I'm so glad he captured this moment. 

Topher also did some PE and art.

Cooper, Phoebe, and Sophie also did school, but I wasn't watching over their shoulders, making sure it got done.

Rollin'

The kids went to a stake youth skating activity on Saturday. I didn't get any action shots, but they all reported that they had fun!

First Day, Again!

This is the first time we've had kids transport themselves on their first day. Cooper and Phoebe both got to skip the bus this morning.

Sophie loved both her first day outfit and her first day hair.

Topher was glad we made his bus on time.

Happy first day, all!

Where Are the Lazy Days of Summer?

This has been our busiest summer, maybe ever. We don't have any big trips planned, we've only done a handful of things for our summer theme, and we aren't dong any major household projects.

Why is it so busy?

Normal stuff. Girls camp, high adventure, FSY, youth conference, library activities, the occasional park visit with friends, and weekly church youth night. Add in newer things like Cooper's cross country practices and Phoebe's harp lessons and it feels like we've been running at top speed. I spent most of Wednesday in my van, driving kids places and waiting for them to finish whatever I had driven them to.

Today I laid down for an hour of quiet time and I woke up two hours later, shocked that I had slept at all. That's how worn out I am from the summer so far.

I love summer. I'm not wishing it away. But, man, I am tired.

We Will Rock You

Back in January, when we started planning the Easter concert, the question of the kid choir came up. We knew we wanted them to sing a few songs for Easter, but is that all they would do? If so, that would be two seasons in a row of only church music. I suggested that we still have a separate concert for them where they could perform secular music, but we would only do two choir songs and let the kids fill in the rest with solos and small group numbers. I thought this would be a great way to let them learn and perform both kinds of music. So we set the kid concert for the Friday following the Easter concert.

In retrospect, this was a poor choice.

My co-director and I were so worn out by the Easter concert, we really had to drag ourselves to the finish line on the second concert. We still gave it our all, but we were running on fumes by the end of Friday night.

We started by setting up the gym on Thursday. Usually we do this the day of, but Thursday night was our dress rehearsal for the soloists and small group numbers and we wanted them to run through their songs in the proper setup. We only had them come for a short time, long enough to practice their song a few times, then they left and we moved on to the next group. We saved our own kids for last and were there until nearly 10pm.

Topher was so excited for the concert that he wanted to wear his choir shirt to school. This is the sight that I woke up to on Friday morning. I convinced him to change and save the shirt for that night. 

It took most of the day to prepare and gather our supplies. This is after I'd already dropped stuff off the day before.

The kids did a great job. They opened with We Will Rock You (we slipped in this easy bonus choir number) and then sang Better When I'm Dancing. The next twelve songs came from the kids. Then we finished with the whole choir singing Fight Song.

Among the other songs that night, Topher sang Hush, Little Baby while Cooper played the guitar.

Phoebe and her friend Isaac sang Princess Problems from the new Snow White.

Sophie and her friend Gemma sang What Is This Feeling? from Wicked.

And Sophie sang Waving Through a Window from Dear Evan Hansen.

It all went well and we were glad when we finished! I'll post the videos of the songs over the next few days.

Sophie borrowed my phone while we cleaned up.

I borrowed it back to take this picture of the two directors in our new shirt design. Walmart stopped making the green t-shirts (they're only $4 each, we can't beat the price) and some of the kids outgrew them. We had to do a shirt shuffle among the choir and we both gave up our green shirts to kids who needed them. Thankfully, our friend who made the other shirts (her daughter sings in the choir) agreed to make us these new, larger logo shirts!

This choir is so fun and I love that we get to lead it, but it definitely takes a lot of time and energy.

Go to Sleep

One of the trickier things about having teenagers is making sure you stay up longer than they do so you don't find them asleep on the couch in the morning, in daytime clothes, laptop still open from doing homework. I guess it's good I'm a night owl.

Christmas Eve Jammies

Merry Christmas!

Somewhere In My Memory

Since 2019 (with the exceptions of 2020 when it didn't happen and 2021 when we were still at home, though I did consult on that one from a distance) I've been heavily involved with organizing an interfaith Christmas concert. When our congregation boundaries were redrawn in June, one of the things I mourned was not being part of this concert. Then I remembered that our children's choir would likely sing at it, so I would at least be part of it in that way. It was a small consolation.

In September I talked with my Bishop and he agreed that our new ward should still participate. I was given the task of putting together a musical number to take to the concert from our new unit. Not too long after that I was asked to join a Zoom meeting with the fellow in charge of the concert. My kid choir co-director was on the call too, so we assumed he would be telling us how many songs to prepare. Nope. The meeting was short and consisted of him telling us he was too busy to do the concert (he was trying to finish his dissertation) and apologetically asking if we would take over. We both said yes.

Among the many (many many many) things I've needed to organize this season, this has probably been the biggest. The concert included members from a Lutheran congregation and a Messianic Jewish synagogue, two wards from The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints (that's us), a harpist and her tenor husband, and our children's choir. There were lots of texts and meetings and rehearsals and Marco Polos involved in the planning. 

Here's our early Saturday morning dress rehearsal with the kids.

The concert was scheduled for the evening of December 15. When our former Bishop passed away we were prepared to postpone if needed. We didn't have to, but the memorial on Saturday and the concert on Sunday made for a very long weekend. When Bryan and I went over the schedule for those two days he said, "So it's basically one long day." Yep.

After some eleventh hour drama, the concert came together beautifully. The songs were wonderful. If I'd thought about it I would have asked someone to record the song I directed from my ward, a triple quartet that sang Good Christian Men, but it didn't occur to me. It was lovely. The music the Rabbi brought from his synagogue was amazing and had us all standing and clapping. Both the Rabbi and the music leader from the Lutheran church told us afterward how wonderful the evening was and how much they enjoyed sharing our beliefs with each other.

Bryan did think to record the song I directed from our little choir. Actually, it's grown each season, so I guess it's not so little anymore. Cooper joined us for Christmas, along with two other young men, so we could add a baritone line. I think this is the best they've ever sung it.

It was a spiritually uplifting night of music and it was just what I hoped it would be.

Yesterday we took these kids to perform their Christmas songs, plus several group sing-alongs, at a retirement home. We thought it was an appropriate way to do service on the Sabbath. They did a wonderful job. 

And with that, our extremely full musical season is done.

Sing Out Strong

I was in charge of singing time this past Sunday. We were practicing songs for our upcoming Primary Program. After singing through a verse, a nine-year-old girl raised her hand and said she could hear me singing more than she could hear the Primary kids singing. I agreed and asked them if they thought they could sing louder than me without yelling. I told them that might be tricky because I'm exceptionally loud.

They accepted that challenge and ran with it.

I love that her observation did more to get the other kids to sing loud than me just asking ever could have. Yay for simple, unplanned teaching moments.

The Din

One evening last week I realized my head was pounding. Then I registered what activities were happening all at the same time. It was not a quiet environment. At that point I probably should have taken some ibuprofen and gone to a quiet room. Instead, I took this video.

The Rest of the Week

Tuesday:

It's a lot easier to walk to the bus stop in the morning than it is to walk home after school. During one walk we have lots of energy, during the other walk we're so tired that we beg to be carried. By we, I mean Topher.

Phoebe has been quite the fashionista this week. I didn't get great pictures of any of the ensembles, but they were darling.

Wednesday:

The BYU application went live and Peter got to work on it right away.

Thursday:

This was the first morning of the school year chilly enough to require sweatshirts. When they got off the bus in the afternoon the sweatshirts were no longer needed.

The First Day Report

Everyone came home from school yesterday with things to report.

Peter gave me a rundown on which classes have friends in them and which teachers seem like they'll be good.

Cooper told me that high school is boring and there's no time to talk to anyone. He said he didn't meet anyone new, even when Peter tried introducing him to his friends. I challenged Cooper to introduce himself to one person in each class today, we'll see how that goes.

Phoebe didn't show up on any of her teachers' rosters and had forgotten where the before school choir class meets. This was stressful for her. She recognized lots of kids from her elementary school days, not all of those kids remembered her. But she did make a new friend!

Sophie said she was sad during recess until two girls in her class walked up to her and invited her to play with them. They're now, after one day, dear friends. She had glowing things to say about her teacher. She also was an integral part of the little boy next door going to his first day of kindergarten. He was in tears at the thought of leaving his mom to get on the bus. Sophie held his hand and had him sit between her Topher on their bus bench. As they drove she told him all about kindergarten and how much fun it would be. She also walked both Topher and our neighbor to the cafeteria where all the kindergarteners were supposed to gather. His mom and dad told me that they were so thankful that Sophie was there to help him.

Topher learned about how to be a bucket filler and how not to be a bucket dipper. He said the best part of his day was when a little girl in his class chased him around the playground. His teacher sent me a picture of the two of them today and said they're already great friends!

Bryan had a regular day of working from home, though he did get to walk to the bus with us in the morning.

And what did I do? Well, after the busy morning getting everyone out the door and my subsequent cry, I spent time writing and editing, I took a 30 minute nap, I attended a last minute meeting (at the park, my kids were not happy to hear that I went without them), then I came home and had lunch and talked with Bryan before meeting the kids at the bus stop. It doesn't sound like I accomplished much, but it was something.

For the First Time in Forever

This is the last weekend of summer break. After the fullest, craziest summer we've had in years you'd think I was ready to have all the kids go back to school in person. 

After all, this will be the first time in four years that all our school kids have been in person. 

It's the first year all five of them will be in school. 

It's the first time in almost eighteen years that I won't have any kids at home with me during the day.

I should be overjoyed, right? Except, I'm not. I'm happy that most of them are excited. I'm looking forward to having a few hours to accomplish some tasks on my own. I'm hopeful that a break each day will help me to be a calmer, less stressed version of myself. I'm genuinely looking forward to possibly taking naps. These are all good things.

I'm also anxious. Will Peter prioritize schoolwork over socialization and friends, especially as he applies to colleges? Will Cooper speak up and connect with other kids and make friends? Will Phoebe embrace her awesomeness and let her natural talents shine? Will Sophie find enough positive friendship and energy from her classmates? Will Topher follow directions and stay safe while he's at school? That's one concern for each child, but I have so many more swirling through my brain. Will I use my own time during the day wisely?

Topher and I went to the kindergarten open house last night. He'll have the same teacher that Sophie had in kindergarten. She's amazing! She has the same level of energy that all those five and six year-olds have. Sophie told me once that she's like a real life cartoon character and I agree in the best way possible. Topher is a lucky kid to have her as a teacher.

As we were doing bedtime a few days a ago Topher told me, "See, the thing is, I'm nervous for kindergarten." I thought that seeing his classroom and meeting his teacher would calm his concerns. As we left the school last night I asked if he was feeling any better about school. 

Topher: No

Me: You're still nervous?

Topher: Yes.

Me: Are you nervous excited? Or nervous scared?

Topher: I'm nervous scared.

Me: Oh buddy, why?

Topher: Because I'm scared to do kindergarten without you there.

Yeah, me too.

While They Waited

While we were in the Temple with Jordan and Leah and their kids, our kids stayed in the Temple Visitor's Center. This is the first time we've left the older kids in charge of the younger kids for this long outside of our house. Bryan and I were both anxious about it, but we also felt like we should be in the Temple. I'm happy to report that everyone was still there when I retrieved them after the sealing. They had made friends with the sister missionaries and Topher even performed a song for one of them. I didn't get a long report about what happened while they were there, but Peter did share an assortment of pictures with me.

Mom's Day

My Mother's Day was full of:

• sleeping in while Bryan got up with Topher
• getting ready for church mostly uninterrupted
• seeing someone upset that their handsome hair (done by Bryan) was too high

• getting to church on time
• hearing the Primary kids, Young Men, and Young Women (so, all of my children) sing More Than Enough to all the mothers in the congregation
• teaching a Relief Society lesson that went well
• coming home and going on a walk around the neighborhood with a friend (and Sophie)
• getting home just in time to find everyone sitting around a beautiful Mother's Day meal of panang curry, prepared by Bryan

• being gifted with cards made by Topher and Sophie and this cool Shrinky Dink bracelet that Sophie made

• enjoying this beautiful bouquet that Bryan gave me

• and getting a Mother's Day picture with the people that get to call me mom

It was a good day.

Speed Poetry

For her World Civilizations class last week Phoebe learned about Sijo poems. They're similar to haikus, but longer and from Korea. The assignment for the lesson was to write her own Sijo poem. Unfortunately, she was hit by a major case of writer's block. To help her get out of her rut I said we could practice and each write one at the same time, no pressure for it to be good or even make sense.

And then she wrote something amazing.

Here's her sijo poem, shared with her permission:

Diving into a world, one between two pages, feels like home,

I meet familiar faces, time and time again, saying hi

But shocked back into the real world, nothing more than words on a page.

I thought her poem was wonderful and I encouraged her to submit it. She did and finished the assignment more quickly than she had expected to.

And, just for fun, here's mine as well:

In my house, all the loud comes in waves and crashes on my eardrums.

Six people talking, yelling, laughing, singing at the same time.

Then night brings sleep, my house is quiet, I miss their cacophony.

Tell It Like It Is

Actual things my children have said to me in the past week:

I had to have my picture taken for something, so I put on makeup. The boys were all weirded out to see me so fancy. The girls thought it was fun. I appreciated the positive reaction, at least until Sophie said, "Wow! You don't look like a tired hobo anymore!"

Topher woke up in the middle of the night earlier this week. I brought him into our room to snuggle and we both fell asleep. He slept in later than usual and woke up after the room was lit with daylight. He sleepily reached over me, patted my upper arm and said, "Mom, your arm is so chubby. It's so big. Do you see how big it is?"